The case of Overachiever

At the beginning of this school year, my friends and I bought our student all-sports pass.

Boy, was that a mistake.

I did attend a few more football games than I would have if I didn't have the sports pass, but when I purchased the pass I was determined to attend a majority of the basketball games.

I have gone to two basketball games. While the season is yet to be over, I doubt that I will surpass the current record I hold because every time a game is scheduled, it happens to be on the best night for me to work.

 My life is awful.

Ok, that's not really true. My life is great, so great that I debate on how weird it would be to start singing and dancing as I walk from one class to another.

But it's so great that it's awful. Does that make sense?

Since the moment I spent my first semester on BYU campus, I have wanted to be a campus tour rep. They  get to take potential BYU students and family around BYU and tell them how great the school  is and why they should come here.

It practically screamed my name when I found out about the job.

I made it a goal that I become a campus tour rep. before I graduate.

Well, graduate is in December. And there is an opening for the campus tour rep.
But because my life is so great, I can't do it.

They require a set time shift that coincides with my History 341 class and my internship at the law office.
My life is filled with so many awesome and great things that I can't possibly fit any more awesome and great things....making my life so great that it's awful.

During my senior year in high school, I attended a academic camp held at BYU during the summer. It was one of the best experiences, I made friends that I still, to this day, keep in touch with. Having such a neat experience as a participant of the academic camp, I really wanted to apply as a counselor. The camp was only held for three weeks during the summer, and I would get rent, meals, and a paycheck.

But guess what? I can't do it either.

Because the most crucial LSAT prep time and the test itself is right smack in the middle of when the camp is held.

The last couple of weeks I have been seriously debating between all of these options.

Do I go to the basketball on a Saturday night or go to work and make money?

Do I want the internship at the law office or the campus tour rep. job?

Do I sacrifice the possibility of scoring higher on my LSAT or becoming a counselor?

Do I sing or dance? Or both?

Some of these aren't really options, they are already set in stone {i.e. my internship and LSAT}, but I think I have the case of  the overachiever.

Not that I think I am awesome or really great, no. It's quite the opposite.

It's because I know I am not awesome and that there are people out there that are WAY smarter and WAY better at everything I do that I strive so hard to fit every possible little thing in every possible minute of my life.

So when I say I have to check my planner or that I might be able to pencil you in, I'm not joking.

So today when I was going over my calendar for the next two months, looking at the dates and times debating whether or not I could shuffle or wiggle some things around so that I could possibly fit in the campus tour rep job, I realized I was crazy.

I am already doing 20+ hours of work, 8-10 hours of internship work at the law office, 16 credits of classes,  a 10 hr/week LSAT prep course, entered a research paper competition, and training for a marathon. All while potentially becoming a maid of honor in the next couple of weeks and doing my taxes.

And I'm thinking of adding another 15 hour/week job, training for a counselor, attending basketball games,  and becoming vegetarian again.

If I'm not crazy then I don't know who is.

What is this sickness I have and how do I get rid of it?!